Im scared ive lost all my confidence..because i dont go out anymore because of high anxiety?

i was going gym to but i stopped goin. i wanna lose weight and need to, i fell in to a rut because i live in a noisy anti social behaviour. and ive become obsessed about movin, but i no itll take time....i have this feeling where, i feel trapped where iam. an im doomed to be here forever...i dont have any friends, find it difficult to make em...i dont own alot of material possessions this puts me in low mood to.........ive been through alot of trauma in my life, and i feel bitter that i have like it makes me indifferent from everyone, i feel like people have made their mark on me..does anyone see what i mean? i just stay inside all day listen to r and b eat junk food with my curtains closed. and i BUFF my helmet alot. i do feel very ually frustrated too. does anyone see wat i mean?